The "love" saga continues

This is the part 2 of the post A love story . So people who wanted to comment and could not....You can do that now... *hint hint, Mr Preetam*







Its been 6 months now that we have separated. Why the hell cant I say divorced? Yes, HE and I have been divorced for 6 months now. The only way to get over all this pain was to work and work I did. Thats all I did for 6 months. I quit everything. My life , my friends , everything. My friends did call me the first 2 months, but then when I stopped calling them or making lame excuses to avoid them , they stopped. I didnt blame them!



Then one day, it was the children parents day. And I decided to go. They were after all MY kids.I saw him and I saw her. And then I saw them. My children were ecstatic to see me and meet me.He wasnt. He was infact furious. He came to me and asked me never to come there again. I didnt expect him to behave like this in front of MY KIDS.



But then, I guess it happened for the good. It was like I was woken up from a deep slumber. I saw that he had moved on. I neednt to get my life together first. Get all the pieces back again. Make my life MY life. As I drove home that night,I decided to make some serious changes to my life. I decided to meet up all my lost friends. Reconnect to all of them. Enjoy life and live in the moment.



I slept soundly that night like I hadnt in 6 months. I slept comfortably with myself. I got up early the next morning. Fresh and full of hope. I sat there at the kitchen table and made myself a cute little list. I love lists :) Yeah I drew a smiley on that too. Life was full of sunshine...



I got my phone number. I dialed the number of a friend..TRING TRING ... That went on.....On and on!! Well it was the weekend..Maybe they were asleep! So, I tried another friend.. and another..But the phone would just ring!

Well if you knew me, you would know I think and analyse a LOT! And so I set thinking. Just generally but then I decided to stop and get going. I realised I was out of orange juice and many other things at home. I thought I should go to the mall . Dressed I did and went. I shopped and felt really nice. Retail therapy , you see!!! As I was walking to the parking lot, I suddenly saw HER and for a change not with him but with MY friends.

I was surprised but then I didnt want them to see me... As I spent the entire day thinking, I realised that they werent truly my friends. They were either his colleagues or the wives of his friends. I had let my life revolve around a single person. I had let his choices become my choices. The more I thought , the more I realised how much I had given up. I had lost myself. When I divorced my husband, I hadnt only lost my family, I lost myself, my so-called friends , I had lost my life.

I know what you are thinking. If they ditched you in your darkest time, they werent your friends. I knew that. But the problem wasnt just that. The thing was I felt lonely. A thing I had never felt before. It was like I didnt know who I was! I was angry at fate for letting this happen, I was angry at her for just existing and most of all I was angry at myself for loving HIM , for letting him become just an important part of my life!! I was just angry!!

My sensible side said to me that there were probably people there who still cared for me. I didnt know who to hate and who not to. I didnt want to "not like" the wrong people. I didnt want to like the right people. I just didnt know what to do..Who to trust ? Who to confide in? Who to believe in?