She wished- 55 fiction

She wished for once she could stick to her decision. She wished for once she could listen to what her head said. She wished for once she did what she wanted, what was good for her. She wished for once, he wouldn't come in, flash that smile at her and make her wishes melt away.

The letter

She walked on the beach she liked to believe was her own. Beautiful clean sand and deep clear water. She walked on the horizon where the waters silently kissed the sands. She walked thinking of days to come and the days gone by. Of all the people she had met, those who had made a difference in her life. Mostly she thought of him. It was 10 years since she had heard his voice. The voice without which she could sleep, once upon a time. She wondered where he was now. Whether all the dreams they had shared had come true for him. Of all the worries they had spent nights thinking about and how the worst among them had come true. They truly had grown apart.

Suddenly, she felt something cold hit her foot. It was a bottle. There was something in it. A message in a bottle? She smiled. It was letter dated 12th April, 1916. The World War-I. Her curiosity grew. She sat down on the warm sand and opened it slowly. Afraid she would tear it. She read. It seemed like a leaf of a diary. 

12th April, 1916
Dear Diary,
It has been a year since he left me. It seems like just yesterday he was hugging me. Holding me close and now it is all gone. The pain too is now dull. Never will it be gone completely but now my brain is clearer. I realise that he isnt coming back.

I wish I could speak to him just once more. Talk to him. Listen to his voice. Tell him what he meant to me. My beacon. My soul. I wish I could tell him how special he was to me. All I wanted was him to be happy wherever he was. I wish I could hold him once more. I wish I could feel his strong arms around me, telling me everything would be alright. I wish I could see his deep intoxicating eyes once again. I wish I could feel that warmth within me which only he could make me feel. 

Most of all, I wish he knew I was all his like I was no-one else's. I wish he knew I loved him and still do and probably always will.

I wish he knew. 

She stared at the letter long, for quite some time. Then she knew what she had to do. She put it back into the bottle and tossed it back into the ocean. And ran back home. She ran like there was no tomorrow. The sun was setting but in her heart, realisation had just dawned. She picked up her phone with shivering hands. And dialled his number. Hoping and praying it hadnt changed. The call connected. She took a deep breath and said, " Hi. It is me. I just wanted you to know that I missed you. No-one could ever replace you in my life. You are special. I missed you."

She then awaited his reply with baited breath..

I fear!

What will happen if two of your worst fears come colliding with each other and confront you? You want to escape and run away. Run away into the oblivion where nobody can ever find you. But that which you fear within it is a person you love. Can't leave them. Can't escape. Something rather that someone holds you back.

Escaping is something that comes naturally to you. Well, at least in situations that have been disastrous before. I have been here before. People have changed but the situation is the same. I fought. I lost. Now I'm not that strong to go on.

I look at the person in front hoping he realises that what he has become and how it is hurting me. But how will he? He doesn't realise the situation I'm in. The horrors of the past come haunting back. I hate the person you seem now. I'm scared. Very very scared. 

Please be the person I love.


The woods are deep and dark. Gliding and hovering around, I want to clear this patch as soon as possible. Hurried and scurried,I move. Suddenly, my eyes fall upon you. With that serene smile, you almost make me stop in my tracks making me feel calm. With a horror, I realise that you are walking towards danger. I can see it vividly. I can see that it can destroy you. And with that crush my soul. I scream to get your attention. I scream as loud as I can and then a little louder. My lungs hurt but you can't hear me. I want you to stop. But that smile of yours makes me believe it may not be so dangerous after all. Yet, I fear for you. I fear that you may be hurt, destroyed. But maybe this path will lead you to a place you truly want to be in. I shall hover around. I shall protect you. I shall pick you up when you need it. Till then, I shall be calmed by that smile of yours.

The first part of this post is a dream I have every night about a friend and the latter part is what I say to myself after I wake up scared and petrified! 

I wish

I just can't come up with something new. I feel so blahed out. This is what I wrote a year back and it is still relevant for today. So, I'm just going to repost it. Sorry, Ma!

I wonder,
If things would have been different
Had you been here.
If I would be different,
If WE would be different.

But today,
I wish I could tell you how much I love you,
I wish I could tell you how much I miss you,
Even though you aren't close,
I wish you were.

The distance between is
Not something I can change,
Nor is what you feel about me,
But all I can do is love you
And hope that you feel the same.

But today,
I wish I could tell you how much I love you,
I wish I could tell you how much I miss you,
Even though you aren't close,
I wish you were.

Maybe you too are hoping
That you could be here,
Going for movies and out for dinner
(since you always hated cooking)
Maybe you don't .

But today,
I wish I could tell you how much I love you,
I wish I could tell you how much I miss you,
Even though you aren't close,
I wish you were.

You are the reason I exist!!!

This poetry is dedicated to my mom...Happy birthday, Ma!!!!! :)

Language and us

This post is a combination of a lot of things. A random chat with a friend about relationships, the prompt at Sunday Scribblings about "language", Jaky's post of which the 1st point was to understand people and a frustration-filled conversation with a friend in the morning.

We all know what happens when we want to say something and words don't seem to be our best friends. What is worse is when we don't realise the impact of what we say on others. So many times, I've reacted in ways that are unlike me and I wonder why. Sometimes, people say things that put others in a defensive mode.

Many of us seem not to realise that language too can put people in the fight or flight mode. Some people just get on our nerves with the way they speak. This style of speaking can be so detrimental for a relationship. Just imagine a person who is always put you on guard. How would you feel? Tired? Unable to keep up? Just wanting to run away.

When language is so powerful, why aren't we more careful in using it? We all can talk. And that is one of the markers of our humanity. Of our superiority over "lesser" animals. Then why not use it well? Why take it so much for granted? 

"You think that I don't even mean
A single word I say...
It's only words
And words are all I have
To take your heart away

Talk, in everlasting words
And dedicate them all, to me
And I will give you all my life
I'm here if you should call to me
You think that I don't even mean
a single word I say.."

- Words by Boyzone!

Fatal Attraction

I was cribbing about being unable to write and my dear dear friend Leo gave me a pic to inspire and I wrote a small little fiction 55 on it. Lo and behold, I was kinda able to write after that I completed the prompt on Acrostic Only. 

I took his small feet in my hands and wondered if he’ll remember me when I’m gone. I didn’t have much time to spend with him. I would miss him grow, maybe even miss his first words, first steps. Would he miss me? Suddenly, he opened his eyes and I realized let’s make memories now.

Fatal Attraction- The Acrostic

Fragile, you seemed
Alabaster-toned your skin
Tenacious, your mind.
Alluring are your eyes, me to
Lands unknown.

As I sit across the 
Table, I look at you moving,
Talking, lips moving in perfect symphony.
Radiantly beaming.
A sigh escapes my lips.
Can't we be together?, I wonder
The pain of separation
Is more than I can take.
One more breath without you is my
Nemesis. My end. My quietus.

I know it lacks flow. But I tried to imply the confusion that he feels on seeing the girl that he loves but can't have.  

Colours, him and her

He loved flirting with colours. She came into the room looking stunning just for him, her painter. He gave her one look and realized it was all a ploy to get him away from work. She smiled standing at the doorway. He left his easel, his colours for her smile.

This is a Fiction 55 (Well, I'm not sure if this can qualify for it but it has 55 words) 

Prompted at 3WW

The Three

In 3 decades,

Three things I want from myself:
  1. Not change so much that I don't remember what it was to be me.
  2. Still be able to dance in the rain.
  3. Think, " I had a darn good life."

Three things I want from my SO:
  1. Appreciate all that I do, even though he might not understand it or it's importance.
  2. Not be passive at anything i.e MUST love action of any kind ;)
  3. Should be strong enough to fight with me and for me. There is only ONE effective way of shutting me up and he should learn that pretty quickly.

Three things I want from my friends:
  1. Keep saying to me, "Rash, stop thinking so much." :P
  2. Continue to understand me without me saying a word. Even if they don't, have the patience to let me say things on my own..
  3. Understand that sometimes I don't msg or call or even pick up when you call but if I were to avoid you, it would be very clear. I'm moody and pompous but I do love you! :)
(I wonder how I will look when I'll 50 which is 30 years from now. WOW...)

Attempted at HoT


The prompt for the week is FRIENDSHIP at Acrostic Only.

It is impossible to say all about this in just 10 lines. But I have tried to capture the essence of it in first poem. 

The second one is in a dedication to a very dear friend of mine. To the sloth bear!

Forever seems a time too little. In
Retrospect, I wonder
If I completely understand 
Everything that transpired, then and now.
Never ending love, undying
Devotion, unrelenting trust
Soothing advice, strong shoulders.
Happiness or sorrow, never ever was
I alone. All along, you tagged.
Perish with me, only shall the feeling of "us".


"Forgive me, will you?"
Repeated he, for the 4th time.
I pretended never to have heard
Echoes of the remorse.
Never ever has a slap been so hard.
Dead inside, the feelings strong.
"Stop," I say to him. 
"Have you realised
I don't ever want to think, ever
Pretend it never happened?"

Dare to be me

Conventions are to be crushed,
I have the knack of defiance,
it seems.
Each day, in some way,
Varied norms, I break,
The moulds of society,
I shun.
I dare me to be me,
Each day, in some way.

Attempted at 3WW: Knack, Varied and Crush